"WARNING! In case you haven't figure [sic] it out yet, this game is intended to be a horror game. As such, it has loud noises, flashing images, and is overall pretty spoopy. (Well, at least it's supposed to be...) If you downloaded this thinking it would be great edutainment for your kid or something, don't let them play it! Unless, of course, they enjoy horror games. "
– The disclaimer
"Congratulations! You found all seven notebooks! Now all you need to do is... GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!"
– Baldi more than ready to spank your ass
Baldi is a teacher and the main antagonist of Baldi's Basics. He is a skinny and ugly man who spends half of the time teaching children, and also other name that who knows is "Baldimore", but the other half spends it in spanking the player's ass so hard that you would rather be sent to Hell than be spanked one more time by this skinny shit. He is also friends with the man who grounds the player for running in the hallways, ignoring the fact that himself is running
fucking hypocrite. His face looks a bit like Olimar. He is also the babysitter of Jesse. He spanked Jesse, that made him sad. He also has a 12 inch penis which he uses to fuck playtime in her ass.