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"Hi, we're the Wiggles!"

The Wiggles are 4 humanoid spirits of unknown origin. Their first recorded presence on Earth started in 1997 when they formed a kid's rock band via human puppets to teach children the wonders of fruit salad.

How To Summon The Wiggles

First you must find a secluded room that has hosted oversized, lethally poisonous animals or people that talk like retards. Bring as many cooked potatoes as you can and four candles. Sometime after school hours, enter your selected room with your potatoes and make sure they stay hot. Light your candles and from a square with them big enough for you to stand in the middle of it, carrying your plate of hot potatoes.

Begin the ritual by repeatedly chanting "HOT POTATO YUMMY YUMMY" for about 20 seconds, the flames on the candles will then begin to rise. Stand in silence until you notice that they are beginning to change color, at this point, close your eyes and do NOT open them. Continue by chanting the names "Dorothy, Captain Feathersword, Wags, and Henry" until you begin to hear upbeat and corny music. You will have a strong urge to dance to this music, do not. When you can clearly make out the lryics to the song, shout "WAKE UP, JEFF" and your most recently deceased relative or friend will be raised from the dead. Open your eyes and quickly wave out the four flames and any of the extra ones that have appeared. When you hear "GET READY TO WIGGLE" leave the room immediately.